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This story originally appeared in the Jackson Free Press. It was added to the Mississippi Free Press website in 2025.
Note that any opinions expressed in legacy Jackson Free Press stories do not reflect a position of the Mississippi Free Press or necessarily of its staff and board members.

Between crime talk and controversy, the news can look pretty bleak. Here are a few headlines—some wishful and some weird—that would brighten Jackson’s day:

Fondren Erects Hip-Hop Memorial Statue

Trump’s Toupee Latest to Bow out of Presidential Race

Council: No to Wasting Time, Yes to Snow Cone Day

Godzilla Tears Down Old Miss. Valley Title Insurance Building

Walker, Texas Ranger Throws Hat in for Sheriff

Charter Schools Reach Critical Mass, Create Wormhole

Clinton Emails Reveal a Ton of Spam

Sagging Arrests Lead to Belt Industry Conspiracy

Mississippi native Donna Ladd and partner Todd Stauffer founded the Jackson Free Press in 2002 in the capital city. The heavily awarded local newspaper did many investigations heralded across the state and nation and served as a paper of record due to its diversity, inclusion, in-depth reporting and deep connection to readers and dedication to narrative change in and about Mississippi. In 2022, the nonprofit Mississippi Free Press, founded by Ladd and JFP Associate Publisher Kimberly Griffin in 2020, purchased the journalism assets and archives of the Jackson Free Press. A Google grant through AAN Publishers enabled Newspack's integration of the JFP archives into the Mississippi Free Press website to become part of a more searchable archive of recent Mississippi history and essential journalism.