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Lifetime Sista Gurl Women’s Television Network presents the Ghetto Chick Flick of the Week: “The Adventures of Nurse Tootie McBride: Medicine Woman, LPN, certified Tahitian Total Health Elixir distributor and part-time Tai Chi Instructor.” In this episode ,Nurse Tootie diagnoses Momma “Too Funky Feets” Tidwell.

Nurse Tootie: “Momma Tidwell, did you sample any bad peanut butter jelly sandwiches or chicken with the flu salad?”

Momma Tidwell: “I don’t think so.”

Nurse Tootie: “Well, have you ever been over to a friend’s house to eat, and the food just ain’t no good?”

Momma Tidwell: “Oh yeah! The macaroni was soggy, the peas were mushed, and the chicken tasted like wood.”

Nurse Tootie: “So you’re experiencing great discomfort?”

Momma Tidwell: “Yes! It’s been going on ‘n on; the pain won’t stop until the break of dawn. And I use the bathroom a lot.”

Nurse Tootie: “Now what you’ll hear is not a test; I’m checking your heart beat.”

Momma Tidwell: “Before you do that, Nurse Tootie, the bathroom is calling me. So I gotta bang, bang the boogie to the boogie; say up jump the boogie to the bang, bang boogie.” (She rushes to the bathroom.)

Nurse Tootie: “I think Momma ate too many diet Chocolate Delight Mints at the Hotel, Motel, Holiday Inn. Anyway, I hope Momma’s senior citizen Medicaid benefits kick in. It’s time for my next patient.”